8 Minute Memoir, Day 32: Beauty

Eight minutes to write about "beauty."  Okay, here goes.  The first thing that popped into my head when I first read the prompt was my own sense of self-worth, the understanding and acceptance of my own personal beauty.  It has taken me a long time to become comfortable in my own skin.  I am almost 30 (only a few months shy) and I would say that it is only within the last 5-7 years that I have gained a stronger sense of self-confidence and self-worth.  I spent a lot of time growing up (even into my high school and college years) comparing myself to others (classmates, the media, and so on--I'm sure you can relate) and I know I spent a lot of time being down on myself.

(circa 2007)

And man, it was a rough road to realizing that I am actually worth a lot more than I realized, that I am beautiful in so many ways, but I feel like at 29, almost 30, I am getting a hell of a lot closer.  I wish I could go back in time sometimes and tell the younger versions of myself that she, that I, am beautiful how I am, that I am worth it, that so much of my worry was in my head.  I wish I could go back and tell those versions of myself that it gets so much better, that if they could see me now, they'd be shocked and delighted.

Because I am beautiful...  I'm never going to be the skinniest woman or have the best fashion sense, but damn if I don't work at being the best version of myself every day, pushing myself to make healthy eating choices and running and working out.  The running, I think, has been a huge part of the equation, and I am so eternally grateful that I got tired of telling myself I couldn't do it.  I am creative and passionate and smart and highly motivated; I am capable of so much, I always have been.  I am beautiful, and I know it.  (And you are, too.)